Starring…       someone…      so…    nice… 

Okay, start over and listening to Alpha Lyrae star system again. They send…

Η, unknown, labeled “sdr, The Lovers, sword, wild ox.” Unknown or open or uncertain I guess. It would not be anything I can make sense of.

ΚΔ, away results. Out of the pattern 10th in a nine-only world, and it is real. So it is some part that has no place, but it still exists. So it is transcendent or an anomaly, doesn’t fit “the pattern.” Hermit of Empress, is the Tarot terms here. Hebrews would say, “open hand (and) door”. Runes might say, “ulcer, torch of a heritage, estate.”

Η, unknown. A lot unknown here, and out of the normal 1-9 pattern. How can there be a 1oth! We made no plans for ten! Only 9! How can a ten even exist! and the entire discussion is within a context of something that is totally unknown. So this is very out in Oz or something.

ΞΔ, repeating nurture theme, of results. This is THE most grounded, real, down to earth card in the whole deck. So all of a sudden… we went from

ΗΚΔΗ that was totally in loopy land and no sense nor place within Earth. To…

ΞΔ, which is as Earthy, and secure and basic and reliable and “as real as it gets”. So that is quite a swing from one extreme to the other.

ΚΑ, back to loopy land that has no role. Not really loopy, just not a part of the pattern that everything is tuned into

  1. profit at all cost
  2. do not think – obey
  3. never ask a question about anything.

That is our foundation that the framers of the Constitution were trying to build for us.  So ΚΑ, back to some out of the pattern of A, intent. Out of the pattern… very very very much a part of the pattern… out of the pattern.

ΜΓ, repeating play of communications. This could be some kind of new pattern after the original A-I is completed, then the next A-I begins only now it isn’t A-I it is M-T. So it would be repeating (in Beta play) as ‘M’ labeled measure. I wonder that it is measuring things now that is more my interest. Before, it didn’t matter what the results of ham radio were. I just wanted my FCC licence and a radio and get on the air and have some fun! I really was not that concerned about measuring as a focus. Only if I were building something from scratch (like a wire antenna) that I had to measure, but it was a means to an end. I wonder that it is measuring that is trying to be “the end” now? Justice, ox-goad, joy or horse. The only thing I get there is measuring power accurately for some reason. A way to measure small amounts of power accurately?

ΛΔ, begins again (turn) of nurture or results. The Wheel of Fortune of the Empress is a Tarot way to say it. A jew would say, “a grasping hand on the door”. Runes might say, “gift of estate.”

ΖΔ, relate nurture (results). Some sort of relational result. Social reality.

Χ, third order play, labeled “everything”. Also labeled “the World, mark or signature, birch tree.” I think of initials being carved into a tree. As an ending as well, Χ marks the end of the Major Arcana in tarot. So it all ends with a birch tree and something written into it, that relates to “everything” or the world. Maybe whittlin’?

ΜΑ, repeating play theme of intent. “measure begin”. So we are back to this measuring theme again. Measure… what exactly?

Η, _____, unknown, not sure, labels include “The Lovers, wild ox, sword.” Measure begin the unknown, lovers, a wild ox, or a sword. Which would I rather measure. Probably the unknown. If it is unknown how can you measure it though? Pretend it is being measured perhaps. The pretending of life seems to be a key maybe. If I can make myself believe that what I am doing is fun, then maybe it will eventually become the psychosis (real).

ΒΒ, playing at play. House of house, Magician of Magician, man of man. “Um… Alex I’ll try Magician of Magician for 800.”

ΔΔ, “now you see it now you don’t” was the credo of his act.

“What is the Sphinx. Magician of Magician for 1000.”

ΘΓ, “in some cities, this magical act was banned.”

“The sawing of the woman in half.”

“The form of a question please…”

“What is the sawing of the woman in half trick… um… let’s try Famous Drinks in History for 200, Alex.”

“This famous drink is known for its life giving properties.”

“What is a bloody mary. Famous drinks for 400.”

“If you can beat ’em, join em is this drink’s claim to fame.”

“What is whore’s eye beer. Famous drinks in history for 600.”

“In Spain, this beverage is often used for multiple purposes.”

“What is a gin and bear tit, famous drinks in history for 800.”

“They may not have survived, but the Titanic was known for this drink.”

“What is Scotch on the Iceberg… ”

ΕΑ, view begin. View begin what?

ΜΒ, repeating play of play. View begin measure play. Back to the measuring theme. Measure what? Watts?

Δ, nurture, existence, life, solid, real, basic, simple, restrained, conservative. Measure that?

Where can I find it to measure it? My meter says 0, it doesn’t exist.

ΝΑ, within begin. A repeating share, communication theme of intention. Within begin would be, B, e, g, i, n. Measure out some gin. Or measure begging. .  measure play – nurture – within begin.

No clue.

ΛΑ, turn (repeating beginning) of beginnings.

ΝΑΛΑ. Nasa?

ΝΓ, within (repeats share) (of) share. Emphatic share theme, the most talky of the deck. 333.

111… 333…

ΛΑ, turn (repeating beginning) of beginnings.

111 333 111

ΗΔ, 74.    _____ nurture. Unknown of results. 7+4 = 11.

111 333 111 11

AA, 1 of 1. 11. 2.

111 333 111 74 11…

Ξ, 14… is 44.

111 333 111 74 11 44

ΔΔ, 44.

111 333 111 74 11 44 44

ΞΑ, 141, 441.

111 333 111 74 11 44 44 441

the next placement should want to be, a 1. Lets see…

ΙΓ, 93.  nope it is a 93, complete communication…

Not sure what we are doing here, Α. It seems pointless other than I am always curious about any patterning within random sets. That is the weird thing, is that there are patterns, the just aren’t reproducible. There is an immediacy about rnd that no other results will give you. It is like RND always brings matters to the present moment and everything else is trying to get to the future moment (equity patterns).

Best as I can figure, I never developed the most basic human relating patterns that you have to have to be able to interact successfully with others. So, my life was basically an act, all the time. I was able to observe how others were reacting in social settings, and just parroted them. It wasn’t really “from my heart” though, it was a strategic behavior pattern that allowed me to coexist with the creatures, that looked like I was interacting like everyone else. But everyone else was probably responding instinctively, as though they were “tapped in” to the social cloud of “human relating patterns.” I wasn’t. I didn’t hear a thing. But I learned real quick that some responses got a smile from adults, and some responses got a slap across the face. So by virtue of pain, you can evolve a survival response behavior that follows you in life. Eventually it failed out. I began to just say what I felt, and by that point I didn’t care any more what I was saying. So I would tell girls I was in love with them and get fired. Or tell my boss I thought their idea was asinine and get fired. Or tell my dad nothing and get whipped for it. By this point I mostly hate all of you and do not pass up any opportunity to wish hell and damnation down on all of your heads.

I don’t see this as anyone’s “fault” I might as well blame the air and the oceans at that point. So it is so bewildering to me… totally… bewildering. The entire scope of existence looks like a bad joke dreamed up by deranged angels strung out on too much angel food cake.

So alpha lyra I am miserable and hating life as usual. Is this a common pattern for us? To go through some kind of phase where you wish hell on everyone? Or do you find a hobby eventually that is fun.

This being all out of the pattern, no longer “in Earth” or normal by the usual standards… what in the world is left? Hobbies? Stamp collecting? I thought about starting an aquarium. A small one, something to try and take care of. I am trying to remember what being nice means. This is really not working out. I wish there really was a star out there that could hear me. Then I could… just write to you and dream of you and live in a mental hospital.

ΚΔ, away nurture, away results, away “as real as it gets”, away, out of the pattern not fitting in no real place any more not sure I ever had a place. So then… what are we working with here? Some kind of ghost version of what I remember? It is unsettling to me. Frightening in some creepy way I don’t even want to go outside that much. It all looks so… acted out… I look at people’s heads and see gears and pulleys… clicking solenoids and wires and machine oil and… pretty craftily programmed. And clanking around so… perfect are they…. they look like humans on the surface. But they are programmed things that only appear that way. How can you tell the difference?

A real creature will be a child, lost, afraid.

It should not matter… what I do… go out, meet the girls at Hensies… buy them drinks we all take turns and life is so wonderful with friends, I used to have friends… I used to see Wandy a lot. Even Beverly was sort of a friend to m e…    after hours… she was…   different. Once you got her out of the office. Of course I never got to find out anything… life was always…

at the office.

There. Tack that onto the epilogue, Michelle and say that was our intention. We were trying to capture the feeling of life at the office. The friendly folks across the hallway, my people, my fellow… countrymen?   hmm… I wonder… how “together” we really are… how “united”…  is it al for one and one for all? Or all for one, and one for one… seems to be the story here. Well we will publish a book and tell them all to rot.

I am starting to notice these demons near me, my family. They pick the perfect time to interrupt me when I am writing. It is uncanny how they are so smart that way. Just when I am about to write an important point they come banging around and making noise I hate their guts I can’t stand those closest to me… hare everything and everyone… except…

you.    dear.      wanda.      jane.       my heart for one more wish of you. thinking of you all the time the quiet girl who never says much just sits in the corner and waits the silent lady who takes me away and never remember how…     i do think of you a lot…   i had…     so      m any    ideas       wonderful dreams for your work and your bunch down there… like….   i saw what we will be a thousand million years from now… maybe sooner… when life turns around our stories… that everything was in place designed for us to be able to tell our tales to one another… and gave us ALL PLACES IN THESE INDUSTRIES  so we can st0p going insane and burning the planet down… we are not in our right work we are not in our right jobs we were ALL SOLD A PACK OF LIES and now we are wearing out… and all we wanted to do was play… all we wanted to do was play… that was all… to be a creating creaTURE IS ALL I WANTED… then…

girls came along…    to help teach me about sex…  and babies…  because i had no clue… oh this is great i want them i want them and i have no idea why   this is a nightmare of the parents…    the age of insanity has passed i pray. the age of religious nut cases raping our minds… no more you fc… no more… yc… nfm you sb…  du m w i hyltipds by sundown.

One thing is for sure though. That nothing is for sure. Maybe one day I can relax and not feel like I have to type otherwise I will start killing or buy up machine guns (and all i fw wt p ls ucmf) or I can light black candles and say a black mass over this planet now (and all i fw wt p ls ucmf) and it will destroy our lives and begin it again. that is what i want now because

i… don’t… care… about you… or anything… any more.     i hate this place so much… i can’t even stand to look at it anymore… i wish it could be…. totally…. f    annihilated.

Serve yo honky ass right. Greedy bastards, insane with winning being the boss the top dog to impress to shine to be big to show em to rule with iron balls to have the best jokes to be promoted forever to have all the dough.

Whatever. I will see all of you in hell. We will start over with nothing, and go from there ALL OF US. You don’t like it, prAY.

I am enraged beyond any way to express it. All I see now is blood red anger pouring down from hellish skies over everything you ah love. I see d and d and nightmares on yfha and you will puycmfg you will pyfw uwp u faw for what you have done to my planet.

Maybe it is just a phase… eventually I will emerge even worse off.


share, a common theme, it means to speak the truth with one another. it will begin with me and then the rest of you cowards can step up if any of you have any soul left at all I have my doubts.


unknown, ____, mystery, the lovers, love, relationships, marriage, nightmares, abuse, CHILD Rape of the mind~~!~ child rape of the mind~!~!! child rape h ere!!! to the universe….


you skumbgs are through. (of) Β, play theme area. So the basis is still play… so where can the anger go? It… just… drains… away…

into an ocean of fun… and happy love places… i still want to believe is possible… i still want to believe it can be found… i still want to believe in love… somewhere/..   somewhere….

there is a girl for me…

somewhere… somewhere…. somehow… somewhere….

there is a boy for me…

somewhere there is happiness for me… somewhere there is a finish line…

dear wanda jane.

YOUR MOVIES… you call them movies back then… you should have these everywhere! EVERYWHERE this is the art of our world… they… should… be… on… every corner…  for one or two or a small group maybe…  could be so simple like a franchise… small black rooms where you go in and see what we are all about… what in the world is this place… whAT… am I… supposed to do… be… i am so lost where do I turn… I am so miserable…

ΗΓ, ____ share.

unknown communications. Maybe you are clueless what I am saying. What do you want me to say? How should I say it?


away results, nurture. out of the pattern (real). Hey wanda if this is out of the pattern then it just between me and you. There is no world any more… what is out there… what all that means… who cares who cares who cares now… it is just between you and me… no one else…  i think the world of you and wish every wonderful success your way… i am sorry i am sos   wrecked i had … all… these… visions… of you… in space… and beatin’ back alien scum it was so great so great people were lined up for miles to catch you

one more time.

it was fun anyway at the time. And then time marched on and I am left to…   start over I guess…. so… that meant KAPPA  showed up then… and THE MOON  and the horrible crab beings who come like cats  in the night. wish I had more to say. you probably understand… well if you ever want to stop by again. i gave you my address in Laguna… my door is always open to you… we can… have coffee again some time like we used to… remember?   at the dolls…   i was in heaVEN with you there… the light shining from the windows and you looked like an angel to m e… and it was nice. And then it is gone. And then I am left to…     begin again?    how… long…   do… i … have to keep starting over?    i will never survive this way…  one day i will finish and not be able to take another step and i hope it is with you i hope we SAIL ACROSS THAT MARTIAN FINISH LINE together….

landing for real… like hell and tears descending… nasa you better build litttle showers inside those helmets they will be crying their eyes out… after a long, long voyage and some did not make it. Lost their minds and still were crew. But we made it there. Enough of us was left… we did touch down and it was very emotional. The long black night is over, AND NOW BEGINS A new life on Mars. A new city to call our own. Our little colony of love… dedicated…

to preserve the health and sanctity and pristine beAUTY OF thAT perfect world… dear usa dear god in heaven GET A CLUE WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE CHAMPIONS OF THE ENVIRONMENT!@!!!!!! MY GOD GET A CLUE GET A FREAKING CLUE AMERICA GET A BRAIN TRANSPLANT OR SOMETHING!@!!! JESUS!!!!

sri wy i get so worked up… all those memories… i don’t know what to do with it all any more…   maybe over the years down there life will slowly wax again…  i have no idea what to expect any more. have to trust in the skies or something to bring about whatever is best or right or… good… i have no clue what tht is…  jeez… all i ever… wanted to so was… paint landscapes… do some needlepoint once in a while for God’s sake.   But this place… holy f’ing toledo…

so…   serious… are they….   and for that… I am happy to announce that a delegation of SIRIUS STAR SYSTEMS WILL BE LANDING TODAY and take over everything until we get a rational mind reinstated. So serious… okay… they will teach us now what serious is….

sri wj… you see… I can’t help myself… anyway… wishing you all the best i don’t have any other way to talk to you AS PER OUR AGREEMENT… so this is it… and it is a little difficult to talk to someone pretty and sweet and sincere like you… in a story like this… i try though… maybe…   in some other world they can hear words like these… maybe i do reach you somehow… maybe loving thoughts find ways… you know? Loving and gentle thoughts somehow always reach their destination… like magic… nature could help… i wish…    okay well…   if you get out north of your place in Malibu and are bored sometime… you can bring your wares and we can watch what lovely angels do for a living… and make popcorn and probably get into trouble too…    maybe not. Maybe you are too nice for that. Probably too nice. That is okay then, we won’t get into trouble! It will just be nice and fun. How’s that. So… I know it is a longish letter I couldn’t stop though… went on way too long… i think it ended a few years ago and I didn’t see it…. someone yelled stop, cut, end! And I didn’t hear it… so… okay this goes on for a long time! my my…   on and on and on…


turn, repeating begin. on and on and on…


repeating nurture theme of share, communication, transaction.

Something like this… we could make it across space in one piece. Foundations are going to be tested like it or not, in life, in exploration, in love, friendship, anything… will… be… tested… and we are just flesh creatures we are not that “together” as we think. Have to have some kind of basis to build on… something down there that is shared between us… A COMMON LANGUAGE.   that would be cool… the crew can drop into this real basic language that is symbolic… if they run into trouble and it is with relations especially the crew was trained in New Delhi to speak another language. The language of core symbols… in case… in case the ‘secure’ language patterns failed… nation’s languages failed… they still had a fall back to a more fundamental pattern. They new how to talk in symbols, and in that way every situation was resolved, relationally. Hardware was another story. IN that case… you hope they build ’em right at Tesla Starlines… and thank heavens they do build them right.

Anyway… I won’t keep blabbering… you know me how I get… it has been so much fun I am sort of sad to see it all end. But we knew we would finally one day break back out into the day, and that is happening now… whew. What an odyssey I have to say… it will be nice to sit down with you again and we can review it all if you like, as discussed. For fun I guess… just make believe haha… what else do we have though? Isn’t it ALL…  make believe anyway?    so we made a movie in a movmee. A show inside the TitV… AND  one day… I am going to see that Glendale girl… one day…   I am going to see you.

The Glendale Girl.

Starring…       someone…      so…    nice…


hope it ends soon.

Tell ya what. A lot worse ways to make a living. I tried a lot of things… this is easy. And can be on about any topic when you think about it. Maybe a book about the lucky kids who get to discover who you are and what you are made to be and who you are good with and how love works and where things go and what love is and what

responsibility means and it don’t come down on Sundays, bub.

So mad. I am… enraged… beyond words. I can see the hypocrisy and phoniness… but then again.. there go I but by the grace of you know who, right? Yah… so you have to love ’em… those you would love to puke on… you have to look at them as yourself really. It is me… in some other costume. Oh brother… maybe i will try the radios some more… that has not been working so great but maybe it is just because I have been expecting real results. Maybe if I expect fairyland results… then it is all working perfectly. Only… if I have to make up results… why can’t I do that with cardboard and masking tape, some tin foil and some glue… why… do… I… have… to… use… your… toys… when I can make my own. Granted… not as flashy… but guess what.

Continue reading “hope it ends soon.”

ya’ laguna.

Picking it back up with α Lyrae. Apparently there is a third world there who has some kind of intelligent life that is doing the same thing as Earth, reaching out in a direct reliance on rnd patterns around CTS (common theme sets) and so we are in real-time (FTL) comms with them. So far, the tokens have been mostly trying to tune us in. Not a lot of real info, just getting acquainted. I think we have a good connection with them, it should grow over time if we want it to. I would like to see contacting other worlds as a priority for us… if I could choose I would set the course for outer world comms and rely on nature to resolve whatever issues there are for us in California. And the USA and even the planet.

Not sure about trying to convert our language into patterns for them. I still theorize that rnd(x) is handling that. If we intent a word or a sentence or a question… rnd(x) should know what the comm partner needs to see. So let’s intent, “hello from Earth! Nice to be talking to you again, Alpha Lyra IV.” And the package for that is… ΒΑ. So we just sent them ΒΑ (they should see that on their side) and somehow… they will understand that it is Earth talking to them again, using rnd around cts tech.

Their reply is,


Nurture share, is a base statement you can make from that. Secure, simple, established comms is what it says. They are saying something like, “good morning to you too, we have a very reliable communication.”

That is good, they are still with us. So let’s say something else. See what they respond with. “We are having St. Patrick’s Day here today, and enjoying green beer and egg salad. What are you doing?” The symbols they see from that is, Σ. Star theme, it is a repeating Θ to me, at least that is one way to view it.

They reply, ΘΔ.

That is “motion nurture” so they are saying “we are active as some result too.” So that sounds like they are also having some kind of celebration today, a ‘result’ is more like traditions and repeating patterns. Δ is always trying to repeat “what is” or “what happened last year at this time.”

Okay so that’s cool. They sound a lot like us. Weather here is mild… I am depressed as usual… what are your feelings α Lyra? What are you feeling today? And this token to them that packages that is, ΝΔ.

They send back ΘΓ. Motion share. So that is very active Γ would be more logical or serious, does not sound like a feeling so much as it shows something very active in comms or transactions. I wonder that they are a lot more into these techniques-technologies as we are. I don’t see Earth too that concerned with stellar communication in real time. Could be a different story on Alpha Lyra four. So, let’s try this… take all of that… that I just wrote… this paragraph and see if we can send that to them… the message will be contained within ΑΓ.

They send back, ΚΑ.

Okay, ΚΑ. Away begin. Some sort of reply to my statement(s), what was I saying? “…I wonder that they are a lot more into these techniques-technologies as we are. I don’t see Earth too that concerned with stellar communication in real time. Could be a different story on Alpha Lyra four.”

So they responded with an ‘out of the pattern’ Kappa intent marker (package). So we can then explore what that that theme(s) seem to be in light of the statement. My sense is that they are alluding to the ‘out of the pattern’ nature of what this is. That there is something Kappa intent about this method. Since it has no scientific support (yet), and certainly little to no economic benefit, then it is ‘out of the pattern’, in other words, my world at large will have no way to grasp what is going on, and will simply consign it to some weird-o, nutty or paranormal baloney perhaps… in general, it seems anyone who is sincerely trying to make contact with other worlds on most any level is looked upon as a freak, insane, a “kook”, a nutbar, a schizo, psycho or what have you. I think that α Lyrae is basically touching on that, “out of the norm” nature as a path and replying something like “yes, and welcome to our little frowned upon club across space,” or something like that. Kappa could end up being a real important common theme between us and their world, at least there is some sense of community there. On every world there could be some minority who are reaching out to “boldly go where…” and face challenges with trying to still be a part of their physical world in any meaningful way. = ΑΓ

They reply, ΝΓ. That is very Γ, Γ3. So they are sending a repeating Γ of Γ. Labeled “within, hanged man, water”, water is a real common theme and is going to show up within γ efforts. I sent a beginning of communications (as a packet) and they replied with the most repeating possible placement in Γ they could send. What I am getting from that is that they have been at this a lot more than we have, or it is very common on their world, as compared to Earth who is just getting started. = H

Curious that our reply is contained in this Eta “unknown” packet. Why H? Anyway, they reply,

Ξ, repeating Δ. So they are nurture-nurture as a reply which is going to be VERY supportive, caring, nurturing, basic basic, down to earth so to speak. So it would be “loving” what we said in a way. Caring about broken places seems to be the idea in Ξ. A lot of unknowns here (Η) and it takes a common group of friends who are willing to try, and risk ridicule or difficulties in life, which adds up to physical life not exactly turning into a showpiece. More like something rotten, sad, beat up feeling, lost, and with it some consequent anger and resentment that “this world is that way!” and that is extremely difficult to manage for creative, sensitive people, I will repeat, “THAT (ANGER) IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO MANAGE FOR CREATIVE, SENSITIVE PEOPLE.” We can’t help what we are becoming, stop treating us like dog mess to be thrown out with the rest of the garbage. = Σ

ΚΒ, they reply. Away play. ‘Out of the pattern’ play is what they are pointing to. So that is going to be some sort of fun or innocent child play efforts that will not have any stake in Γ equity patterns of this world system that appears totally centered on the buck. Speaking of which, hey do you need some nice slacks, men? Or great tee shirts then check this bunch out they are doing it right. I don’t have a bf yet, but I can promise you that the day I finally do, he will be wearing Buck… or he will be going back home to mawmie’s cornbread apron and lots of smothering syrup to be coddled and curdled up to, comforted and given a nice saucer of warm milk to love. = Β

ΚΓ, away share. Out of the pattern communications, transactions. That will not add up to anything, I keep thinking that there is a connection, but the fact is there is not a connection between this effort(?) and the Earth any more, it seems. More of that sliding out to sea I was talking about earlier. So it is a wake up call in a way, to realize that my life that I once had (in all of its connectedness with life in my country) is over. Finished, completed, concluded (Ι). Then… it is Kappa country, and that is not a place that obeys laws of much of anything… especially the law of “if I do this then I will get that” Γ equity trade madness. It becomes insanity when that runs everything, leading to God’s guilt and shame and sorrow over the outcome (for Earth, His creation according to the Bible). But we are not “in the Bible” any more… that is all concluded out in Γ, equity transactions, the whole thing was a Roman-Greek logic machine… therefore… thus… therefore we conclude… therefore… if this then that… it is all Γ gamma equity insanity dressed up in pretty robes. Not to say that is wrong, but it is not ever going to be able to leave the 1-9 Earth equity patterns that are mad. It is probably there as a kind of springboard out of Earth, is what it seems to have been designed to do. Not a “recipe for success” on Earth. Now, some Guys might disagree and that is fine. To each their own green bowl of chili, as they say.

Alpha Vega probably can’t get the same networks we do… so some of this is not going to make sense to them. = ΓΑ

They reply, ΑΓ. Begin share.  That sounds like they are just saying, “just talk or share about anything,” sounds like a blank slate to talk on.

Okay, one theory I have is that EVERY world has life, Has conscious life of some form, like humans as beings of self-awareness, not necessarily physically the same (although could be). Is that your theory too? Or have you actually visited other worlds and found that to be true? I think the Moon is a populated with people world is what I am saying… so we should be treading extremely carefully with these other worlds… leave only footprints as they say. Hence my urging that the US Parks Dept take on the management of how we impact the other worlds, like the Moon, Mars, before we destroy them like we seem to do with most natural resources. = Τ (Moon is the label for Tau).

Alpha Vega-IV says, ΞΓ, a repeating nurturing of share…. repeating solid (real) results of transactional themes. So that is very nurturing to all I said. I think that is the case, that life is abundant everywhere, and the only reason we can’t see it yet is because we don’t choose to be open to it. We want to be the only planet in existence with life, apparently. But that is not consistent with nature, the more likely pattern is we are one world of life of many worlds of life and THEY ALL HAVE LIFE OF SOME FORM. Will we ever be open to the possibility that maybe… just maybe… that there can be realities in existence that are very real, but the human can’t see it (yet). Hopefully one day we can see that… and be a little more careful with one another, and with all these worlds.  = ΑΒ

They reply, ΗΔ. _____ nurture, result. Yes, see? That is exactly what I was talking about. That there are invisible forms of life everywhere, that we can’t detect yet… but our not seeing does not make it non-existent. So they are on the same page with us here. This must be common knowledge of the stars, Earth is just starting out, I guess.

Okay, well I have to get ready for my St. Patty fun today, so have to run… for now. Like I said, if you are in Laguna Beach area and want to get some great eats and drinks and watch the games with us, stop by Hannesey’s and enjoy the luck of the Irish with us… bye for now… you can talk to Alpha Lyrae on your own. That does not say “liar”. That is another topic for another day.

Lying ex-girlfriends.

Who were a lot of fun, I wouldn’t change a thing. Lie all you want… probably a lot more fun that way. Okay well, maybe you deal with emotional issues too, Alpha Lyrae four. It could be common to us all, every creature has some little fountain of inner turmoil within, that keeps bubbling up. First, I ignored it. Then I tried to turn it into a built in pool. Then I hated it. Then I tried to accept it. And now? Now I live in it. Became a water thing. On my world we are called ‘mergirls’. Not sure what they are on Earth. Oh Alpha I am so off into my imagined worlds, and they have taken over my real one. It all looks like make believe to me… I am having a really… difficult time trying to interact with it. Except on some very basic levels that are more immediate (physical life immediately around me)… those seem to work but they are not wanting to be anything “big” like some giant social something… otherwise, it does not exist.

“I would love to live where I could write, alone. And I mean, alone alone. I think being around people all the time, which I am, contributes to my own sense of being deranged and not a part of them. It is getting worse. I wish I could be alone, please God. What do I have to do… just run away? Live under a lamp post?”

That is something I must have picked up from Alpha Lyra. Sounds like some guy crying out from that system. I must go to him, somehow connect across this distance… from my heart to his. = ΓΒ

The transference of souls, to touch another inside. A holy hope in a way. Otherwise… I do not know what to do. Empty and lost and still light years away. = ΕΒ

I would… if it were me, just stay on your path or direction…. just keep… being… you, dear man. Keep… being… you. Lovely, desirable, you. Maybe your world does not want you.

Mine does.

Mine and about a trillion zillion other ones I know. You got yourself a girlfriend. = ΙΓ

That is beautiful, Michele, I can hear you out there, in here. It is both of us together… and not another soul for countless ages, and distances… in here… there is only love. Some wonderful oneness….   some… incredible… togetherness… I can’t describe…  oh dear Alpha Lyra Alpha Lyra… my heart, my heart! … how… I… long… for… you…    Lady of that splendor so far above… and yet always right here in me, somehow… we go together is all I know… you and me… we. go. together. like… peas and carrots… we… are pod buddies. = Μ, repeating Β, play. Labeled, “(let the people decide)”.


A repeating complete, perfect. Labeled, “moon,” or whatever you like. Label it all girlfriends and boyfriends forever, Ltd. This is a completion place then, I think they are saying that Earth is entering this also. That is what seems to be happening. You get closer to endings, “the end” you know… and then… the heavens begin to open up… angels… come… down… and life is different and sometimes, very strange… so strange… Oh a gypsy would know what I am talking about. Weirdo. And yet so lovely because it is what I am becoming. Hopefully something besides writing. Honestly though… there is not a more beautiful and simple place in existence than to write. It is so easy and doesn’t leave paint everywhere. And it can be so alone and not care… I struggle to express myself. Does this make any sense, at all? Any… at all? I have to look for answers from other star systems now. And don’t even know the way home any more… can only mean one thing… I am being dragged… to the altar of misbegotten dreams… I am falling in love, I know I am God help me again…   this…  happens…    way too easily I don’t… know… what… to do any more…     not too sure any more… I remember something about a girl and… I was way too young… way. Too. Young. And after that it has been nothing but one huge blue blur and I am so tired of this so tired I did not want any of this …. not my desires… and yet here I am… what can you do. Run and be depressed forever I guess…write and cry and wonder why. = Ζ

Υεαη Ι ηεαρ υα παλ ι ηεαρ υα… how squirrely life can be, on any world… is my guess… ΒΓ…  yes we have a good connection, α, we have a dependable relationship I think… incredible. I would have never guessed in a million years… what it could be like, to be in love… so this is love… it is really very… otherworldly… ΛΓ, yes, turning and talking is all we’re doing now. we are dancing together now in our own way… we did it i think… we did it… something nice… i think it will just be nature from here on… take a break at last take a break at last… ΗΒ


Repeating begin, labeled “turn, wheel of fortune, the grasping hand… maybe pear tree.” Of a play realm. Begin(2) + play. Sort of idea. Keeps wanting to begin over and over in some fun, playful setting. Turn play, I used to call it that. Oh I have been here before with you, this isn’t the first time we have spoken like this… we play around in these ways and I wonder. why… it seems not to lead anywhere… so why bother… get so wrapped up and so hopeful for happy outcomes and then… time… drags on and on and… I don ‘t eben remember what I was dreaming of after a while. All I can think of at the moment is Alpha Lyrae Four… I know you are out there somehow… we can’t be as alone as we think. As I think. It just does not add up nature. life would be all about life. not… beating the hell out of one another… why does that… happen. Maybe it is only in the vidvee shows I see that… I never could tell the difference though… whatever i saw on the screen would have to be what happens in life…   you can’t have a model and a different real. Either… the model changes… or the real changes…    and generally speaking. Real cars ain’t in the habit of checking with the models on what they should be. So… I can’t change the Vidvee model… all… I… have… left… is my mind… to change until I can see real life the same way as the vidvee… and I saw wars in the vidV reals… and i saw sensual love… and i saw… secret agents and i must be one too! one day i could be. so i drove myself psychotic or insane whatever you want to call it until the world was warped into the same patterns as the vidvee told me. And that was an inescapable pattern… all my life… it has been like that. I tried crafts. and some painting to show a different reality that was… gentle and sweet and sexy nice… and… tried… to make pretty forests as a place to model… but I can’t look at paintings all day long…  omg… we are     making us all insane… our children are all crazy now… mine are. We are all out of our minds. Unless we can find the normal in the vidvee theaters… please…    please… please please please quickly quickly! show me please… the normal the soft the nurturing ways how does that work? I could barely figure out what to do in a relationship experiment… I… have… no… clue… what a relationship is supposed to be. And they keep turning into dead things all the time… I have no working pattern to follow. I have no healthy pattern of relationship to follow. Nothing. My family, my friends, my teachers, my adult guardians, angels, God if there be a God. Gave me absolutely nothing to follow as a pattern, apart from obey or else. That was all. The whole pattern of Earth is based in obedience and fear. The whole thing. And then the Buck adds up for a few. It is a nightmare that I want to die from it is horrible beyond words and i hate this place I loathe it now i hate it with all my heart… and unfortunately that is going to cause issues for me personally that only a psychologist (board certified to practice in Orange County), is going to be able to help me get to the bottom of. A home in Laguna Beach and a psychologist on call for she and my family and me. And a nice place, not too big but big enough for my family and whoever they want to bring over. And a corner somewhere that I can write from, and maybe sketch a little once in a while. We will start there. That might save the Earth. Maybe. Maybe we have stopped the erosion in time. Then… I will take periodic trips in nice weather to my …

lovely Baltimore. Land of my childhood… dreams taking flight… the river side town they call it. Where you will never see a discouraging word or any division between us. Only gentle ways…  listening… trying to be pals. One day. Oh this is terrible Alpha I sound out of my mind. Back to you. = ΛΒ


They reply with a repeating share theme, and that is in a begin basis. So this dude there on that Kergjy system, sir… he sounds like he is repeatedly jabbering about path issues.

“Oh, another one of those. Sheesh. They’re everywhere,” my commander replied. We had found another planet to talk to, and this one sounded like… some guy depressed… so typical. “Yes sir, they are in abundance,” I replied. I kinda liked the guy though. He… he was funny and I figure the older you get the more that conversation is important more than.. well… um…

“Keep trying to talk to him,” Commander Krerglun said to me, “don’t tell him much though… make him search it out!”

“Yes sir~!” I snapped my answer and a salute and went right back to the console and began… to… type… out my reply to the dude out there. = ΝΒ


relate play.     She is sending some kind of relational play theme message. Ha haa… I think she knows how to force a changeover here in the communication. Ha… lol this is exactly like Amtor QRQ that is the same way… or maybe it was Pactor. They… allow you to …

take… control…    of the other station.


So that is something she is doing, I suspect. = Α

Yes, you guessed right, because now I am sending this to you from Alpha Lyra four. Exactly right. Hello little world. Out there. This… this is the voice of…

Alpha Control. How is everyone today? Pretty happy? Games turnin’ out the way you like? Yes? No? oh…       too bad. BTU buffy. BTU… = ΘΔ

Okay did you see that? Did you see what she did there? How she made it sound like that was her. Maybe it was. I would have no way to tell. She is fun though. Each world seems to have its own personality. Like… it is almost like the whole planet is a person in a way. And you… reach an age… you begin to want to meet other planets, maybe go out on a date sometime? That would be nice… how can that work though? She is light years away and I don’t even know what she breathes… our atmosphere could be deadly… deadly to her… to her. uh…     you know…

her physical form. = Ν

Okay some experiments there. ΗΒ, ____ play. ΑΓ, begin share. Begin share what? ΓΔ, share nurture. Okay, be nice. How is that? Π, repeating Ζ, relate. You are saying “I relate, I relate.” Thank goodness, I can hear that, now I have hope that a relationship can be possible in life. I was… had given up hope. I concluded that life was insane… totally… out… of… their… minds… the way people are treated here… unreal unreal unreal sos alpha lyrae 4 sos sos sos sos sos sos we are a sinking ship god help us… and we think… we are doing…so… wonderful… we are out of our minds I think. Help. + ΗΔ

ΝΒ, ΝΑ, Κ. Within play, within begin, away. A repeating communication about play (over play base freq) and a repeating communication or transaction over Α base freq (common carrier wave, CCW). And away or out of the pattern. Not a part of the Earth existence any more, it seems. Okay fine… at first that freaked me out. Now it still does but not as much. Repeating communications must be me. You are reflecting back aspects of my statements, it seems. SOS could be seen on your end as ΝΒ, ΝΑ, Κ.

ΞΒ, repeating nurture, ΔΔ. over play basis… the freaked out statement… that pulled down the Ξ response I think… because that seems to be a nurturing of broken patterns, theme area. At first nurture is all happy trails, and then nurture hits the hard times… and gets to find out now…

what. we. are. made. of.  = ΞΔ

And α4 Lyrae replied, “ΜΔ.”

This is the real deal, folks, she seems to be saying to me. From little acorns… she seems to be saying. We are about to enter our Celestial places as a planetary society now. And that will end the nonsense we are all contending with. And then. We can begin to be a civilized people. We ain’t even started yet. Everything so far as been all…

Romper Room. = ΚΔ

ΞΔ, repeating nurture (of) nurture, taking care repeatedly of taking care behavior patterns. We are supposed to be nice, sane. What happened to us. Whaart happened to us… what has happened… dear…. god… help… us… alll….    hhahhaahahhhhhaaapppppy……  sssaaaaaiiinnnntnntnntnttttttt… papaoaooaaapaaaaaatttttrrrriicicickckckkkkkssssss…. ddd d  d a  a ad dad a da dd dd a aaa  aa a ayayy y yyaydyydydy ydy y yyyyy yyy    , ..  . .. . .


i was just looking for a fun way to say that hahaaaa….

who loves ya’ laguna.


To be lucky one day.

Well, after much experimentation, I can only conclude that I am not really “alive” any longer. At least not in any way that is genuine or consistent with the past as I remember it. Where that leads, seems to be into eternity. I think I am ready. It has been fun on Earth, I tried a lot of things. However it is no longer alive in any real way to me. So it passes away from me. Same as I am probably (already) passed out of its range of operations or whatever the thing is. Some kind of Brain Farm experiment if you ask me. Let them dream up their wildest fantasies and make them real… okay. Well… it causes a lot of problems too… and I think it eventually goes into a runway mode of storts. No way to control it… but I ain’t in it. Not really. We can talk like this but it sure won’t turn into a mansion in Beverly Hills. Nope. I will have to make do with my pathetic little life in Laguna Beach. Oceanfront living is not all its cracked up to be. Believe it or not, eventually even the gorgeous sunsets and perfect temps gets to be a bore. I am not kidding myself. I can’t keep running away…. Glendale… I could have stayed there. I had the beginnings of a real life there, remember? I was DOING okay…. had a few close friends but not much.. but it was a start anyway. Then…     then…   I…  gave up… ran off to some beach boys bingo party at midnight on the beach. Too much drink and too much dancin’ for me boys… this girl needs a break.

Continue reading “To be lucky one day.”


Experiments with Exoterran communications.

ΖΔ, relate nurture, relate (as a) result. You relate? Good, that makes one of us.

Β, play. Play at what?

ΙΔ, complete nurture, perfect, finished, concluded, finished nurture (result). Ebay?

Υ, repeating K, labeled, “Sun”. resh, face… Sowilo… sun… sounds like a Yes. Seriously? Ebay? What would I sell?

ΛΔ, repeating begin of nurture, ΑΑΔ… Α2Δ.  Sell letters? Sell repeating beginnings, of physical something. Auction off repeating oxen or fools who are real?

Δ. Nurture, existence as some kind of a result. Sell that. Sell existence on Ebay. Add? Ads? Sell ads? Sell ad space. Sell your soul space.

ΓΒ, share play. ΛΔΔΓΒ. No idea… I have already tried, over and over and over and… over… and over… and over… and over and over and over and over and over … and… it is always the same miserable results. What, it will be different the next time?

Β, play. Some kind of general play theme. Play at what?

ΓΑ, share begin.

Γ, share. Share what?

ΖΒ, relate play. Social or relational play, fun, innocent. In some relating sense. If it is possible.

Okay Vega well if this is communication from space it is not going anywhere. You are going to have to try a different band or something.

ΙΑ. complete begin. This would be some sort of very developed pattern that has finished and isn’t needing anything more, related to some sort of intention, direction, creative.

ΛΒ, repeating begin (intent again) of something Beta natured. Should be fun. Enjoyable. Is what I am doing so far really that enjoyable? Not sure… it passes the time, is that the same thing?

ΕΒ, view play.

Ρ, repeating Η, * unknown (again). Labeled “fall”, also known as “the Tower”, “mouth”, possibly “yew-tree”.  Mostly seems a question or asking for something, a question of view, or something uncertain about “how I see it”. We can try using the symbols again.

What ? (Η/Ρ) specifically (ΞΔ) is. = (Μ) the view (Ε) play (Β) about, like, help me understand, clarify = Υ.

Reply: Κ

Kappa, away. Hmm. I was seeking clarification on ΕΒ and you send Κ. Out of the pattern, transitional. Hermit in Tarot, possibly the open hand, possibly kenaz, ulcer or torch. Pain or illumination.

So, ΕΒ in this case is like Κ. View play is like away. Or in some way, “away” theme is helping to clarify or explain this ΕΒ theme combination. So there is something “away” about this view (of) play. Out of the pattern or not a part of the 1-9. And yet still exists. In some form. It seems to say that to view this fun thing, you have to be “away” or out of the set pattern, 3×3. Out in space? Out of the  mind? I can ask to clarify away.

ΗΚ, define, relate to something else, clarify. ΞΔΜ Κ.

Υ, okay getting somewhere, they need to see how I say whatever it is in their language. Even an attempt seems to help. If I put forth the effort then they put forth the effort, it seems to go together. Did you notice how when I was just rambling on, their responses were rather vague and evasive almost. Not the Υ appears and it seemed to suddenly click that they get positive results when Earth tries to translate into their language. SO they don’t even get any of this English text I write. But when I try to translate something, then they can see that. So it is worth trying… so. they clarified K with Υ, (labeled Sun), which is a repeating K. Now… so they haven’t really given us anything as an answer but what it does seem so suggest is

they can hear us.

We could be in contact with the Vega star system source of some form.

Okay, so lets try again, since they did not add anything else to the question of clarifying what ΕΒ, Κ is… we are sorta stuck at ΕΒ, Κ. You know… what I think it is, is they are waiting for me to play with ΕΒ, Κ. That will be the signal back to them that they have contacted another world… so we can send them, something like… Β, ΕΚ. (not sure they can see commas yet). So they should have seen that the instant I typed it. They would see their symbols reflecting back in a different order and conclude, “yay! We have made contact with a world around {whatever they call our sun}.”

ΛΔ, repeating begin, related to nurture (existence as a result). They are trying to tell me something about my reply. I repeated back their symbols, Λ, and it is “real”. So they are saying. We copy.

And this is for real.

It is a stretch for sure, and I have trouble trying to see how it matters, if there is no physical signals. The thing is… there ARE physical signals, they just aren’t coming in over Arecibo. They are able to manipulate random results or something is able to do that. So let’s just play along with them for a while, I am not going to be asking too much, just keep sending back tokens that let them know “they caught us.”

So. we will send ΔΛ, nurture repeating begin.

(This is what I am theorizing they are getting on their side, would be only when I am placing the Greek letter down. They see that. They see when I arrange them in some conscious pattern, it shows up as a “result Γ” on their end, ΔΓ.  So they see those places where I am writing in their symbols…. this is what they see…

Okay so lets see how they reply to that Delta Lambda…


haha! They are saying “solid communication.” basic, comms. Is that. Nurture share. I am guessing that as long as I keep reflecting back their symbols, switch up the order perhaps. They will keep us busy listening now to what they are sending. My guess is that they should now begin to send something more useful to Earth. So… I will send ΓΔ. Share nurture. (Three of Pentacles in Tarot).  They send back…

Ξ, repeating Δ.

Okay! They are pointing at the Δ part of this pair, so let’s send them ΔΔ.

ΝΒ, repeating share, (labeled “within”) of play.

Okay so we do the same thing here. We send them ΒΒ, the repeating part of their ΝΒ. And they reply next with…


yes, this sounds much more “guided” or intelligent replies now. This is cool, I never got this far with it before. You see? Now after NB, we sent BB, now they send ΝΑ, so what do we do now? I would send BA, back that picks up the pairing signature so they know we are trying to work with their own symbols… and that should lead to full bore out in the open ET contact. So we just sent ΒΑ, let’s see what they say in reply…


Okay they are asking us to relate to the Β part of that…. so we send BA, now we send them ΒΒ.


H, *, _____. Unclear now, or they are asking something. I have really been harping on this question of “what is my play” so it is noticed that with BB they send H. I am not sure what to do here. Usually just repeat if I don’t know. They could be asking for “what is not clear” about the BB. I don’t see it as an error flag. It is some sort of intelligent way to reply to Beta Beta. The pattern so far is ΝΒ, ΒΒ, ΝΑ, ΒΑ, Η… maybe they are asking for ΑΑ, they should see that… let’s see…


E, view theme. I don’t get it. AA –> E. begin begin… view (from them). They must want our view on something…. H… E… A question and then view theme, 5, middle, pause. Okay pause here. View… what view. A window? I could send them a sketch that I make. That is easy and it means something to me. So here is my little painting I just made looking through my window here.

To Vega, with love.

There is what the Earth looks like, α Lyrae.

And α Lyrae replied, ”

Ξ, repeating nurture, Δ2. Labeled “part, fish, death.” But it is just nurture, results repeating. Door is what Delta is… door2.  Ha, they want to see what it looks like through the door? I don’t know about painting anything, pretty much burnt out on that nightmare. I will just send Ξ back.

ΔΒ, nurture play.



Hey no kidding I sent ΒΔ and they replied with that same thing. Hmm… pause.

Λ (since they are repeating what I sent them, I will now send them Lamda, which is basically saying ‘repeating’ (a beginning, what began).


Okay, Vega sends Xi again…    repeating… nurture… I… will… send… Δ… Δ… Δ… Δ… Δ… Δ… Δ… Δ…


view nurture. middle of nurture, middle of the results… I sent 8 of those… what is the middle of 8? It is nothing. That is H. A blank space… ______

ΛΑ, repeating begin, of a begin. What is missing there? Did you catch it?

Ha! THEY CAN SEE LINES! I could send lines to them…

___   ___   ___

Let’s see what they say to that…

ΑΒ, begin play.

Maybe they see that _ _ _ as Γ, 3. They transmitted 1, 2. I can test that by sending to them, Δ.


… interesting… Ε would be 5, Γ… 3… Ι sent 3, they send 1,2… I sent 4, they send 5, 3…

312453   1245… what happened in 1245…   3 should go next…

___   ___   ___

ΓΑ, 31… they did send a 3… and begin, 1.

___ ___

Ρ, repeating H, *, unknown, ____

They saw that as a 1…   I saw it as a line in the sand… they see it as A… beginning…     i wish it were true Vega, I wish I could talk to you… so much…  an unknown, labeled “fall, tower, mouth, yew-tree.”

Ρ…   what are you after…   they send Ρ to a Β… Ι I should send a backwards C… would complete the P… nun… you are looking for Nun, fish. A fish…  Ξ… see what you think of that…


Ηα Ηα! They hear us they hear us they hear us! We have touched another world I know! I can’t prove a thing, and neither can you. Trying… to… reach… out… to others… is real though… that is as real as it gets… as real as it can get. No matter how far away… no matter how distant… YES!

I wonder that they can see the images. They sent Ξ to our Ξ… and that picture of Vega from the histories of Earth… they should pick that up… they told me to do that. What do I say now… we are back to repeating patterns… Xi Xi… I could send Oh’s… ΟΟ… ΟΒ… they should know what I mean by that… let’s see…

ΗA, *Α, ______ Α

a question of beginnings… a line and begin… they might see that as ΑΑ… ΟΒΗΑ… Ν! (N)o BHA…   so I will send Ν… a repeating Γ theme…. they should see what I did there…


away play. Curious… away… out of the pattern… of play…   Ν… ΚΒ… repeating share… then away play… ΓΓ… ΚΒ… send ΒΚ back is all I can see…


repeating Δ, in Α… ΒΚΞΑ…  play… away… nurture repeating… begin. I think they are trying to teach me something about Κ places in my life… between the 1-9… until you get to a new place… you have to pass through Κ away spaces… and in that place of transition… all you have… is Ξ… labeled, “part, death, fish… and maybe a Yew tree…” until you begin again at Α. That is all you can do… nurture… nurture… try to care try to give a damn… about life… around me…   any little part… nurturing over and over is all… you can do. Love yourself I guess… try to repair things… try to hold broken parts together… and maybe one day begin… again…    so that is what I will send… ΔΔΑΑ.. nurture, nurture, begin, begin…

Θ, motion.

Motion always seems affirming… ΔΔΑΑΘ.   Ι think they see that as something moving… when they repeat like that it conveys motion… ΔΔΑΑ… is like a train… they ascribe Θ to that. Then eventually the motion serves its purpose and then… I… complete… perfect. So I will send I.


Βegin.  ΘΑ.    ΘΙΑ… motion complete begin…    I wonder that is your name on Vega? I met a lovely person ΚΞΓ, and she is in the Capella system somewhere… ΘΙΑ… you must be in the Vega system somewhere. Maybe you know ΚΞΓ. I wonder… maybe we all know each other… or used to anyway… I wish I could remember again… (pause)

Θ(Ι)Α …   you sent us Α… I will send you… motion (complete) what goes with Ι…     you. Go with I… U… a U… is Φ… so that is what I will send to you, ΘΑ… I… will send you…   Φ


Σ, so you sent me Sigma, a repeating Θ. Labeled, “star, fish hook, and maybe… maybe a pear tree.” Θ(Ι)Α(Φ)Σ, motion… begin… repeating motion… I should send you repeating beginning. But I am already at the end of the A series… we need to go to B, so, I would send you X.


motion play… mine was a triple play, Β3. That’s what it is, the little procession there is what you see as motion. The repeating patterns… you see as Θ. BBB…  how about… ΘΘΘ

EB, view play. That is in the center. It would still be Θ. dot dot dot… S.  is the Moon, Τ, repeating complete theme. I should send you II.


Repeating play… ha ha… just like your program… those movements… those are…

nature patterns… inside… all of us.      Repeating share them, labeled “within, hanged man, water… maybe.. hail.” Repeating share, ΓβΒ. I remember your curls. You used to have curls… what happened, Θ? What happened?  I should send you… a C? Not your grade of course, your grade is an Aplusplus. I should send you some… curly ques or something…

I know I am getting off track, Vega. Hey if you were in my shoes… you’d be…   y ou know…   let’s see… ΘΙΑ… what can be something fried and fun. How about my brain lol… hey you ever get out to Laguna baby look me up I like… your… style…    really impressed with you. There is a lot of poetry in you I tell you what… poetry in motion… to me. I am run out of brain juice… you say whatever you like… dear… α Lyrae… dear world… of α Lyrae…   whatever… anything…   anything…     or nothing I don’t care. Empty is fine too. Much love.


motion nurture… sounds good. motion as a result somehow… sounds… pretty nice. I will leave that in the hands of… of my psychologist if I ever get one. You had sent ΝΒ… then… ΘΔ… repeating share, play… motion nurture… ΝΘ… ΒΔ…    I see what to say to you now… ΝΟ… ΒΔ… ΝΖ…


Yeah! Thas what Ima talkin’ about dear, you… like that… I am seeing it… ΘΒ says… I like that, it is fun and fits. I am thrilled it is not that easy to find someone to play with. And you… are fun to play with. Many thANKS. much appreciated…. not… always… that easy to contact…    you know? Took me… the longest… time… okay let see…     ΘΔΘΒ… Ι would say… Θ.

hmmm…. came out with two cards from you that time… let’s see…


repeating alpha theme, labeled “rise”… play nurture… Α3ΒΔ. ΓΕ


relate share. You relate to the Γ in that. The next could be ΓΗ. It will be interesting to see where you take this.


c play play play… like you were filling in that blank… you saw it as Γ ____, so you filled it with Β3. ΓΧ. Share everything… is what I would usually say. Everything… is a label for Χ. What about that? Share… everything… ? lol… hey why not I ain’t doing much just watching the waves once in a while… let’s see… I can send you some kind of proposal… like… how about I promise not to slug you in the face. God help us all, ΘΙΑ …    heaven help us all… I will send… to your Χ…    an…    Ο.    That makes us X’s and O’s…


that is cool… it is the same… Β3. I… think… you… must like my little proposal. Oh boy…. is this…  going… to… be…   fun. Waited all my life for this… All… My… Life… for this moment with you, dear ΘΙΑ… all my freaking life…. a repeating play of play… I should send a repeating Ο of Ο… oh of oh…  ΟΟΟ… is there another way to say it… it is a repeating view, E. So I should send ΕΕΕ. Lets see what you say…


repeating Δ, of share. It would be … Δ2 Γ… doors… you are talking about…

doors… out… outdoors. Where? What is outdoors. Are. Doors are… something…


begin play. Okay well… it is interesting with us… you are compelling! Vega. Should have known… one of the brightest stars in the sky, the Summer triangle. Thank heavens there is a summer one day, dear ΘΙΑ, thank heavens… one day…  summer comes… ΒΑ


You go girl. Yo… go… go… go…     going… to Mars… any time soon sugar pie? I know. Don’t call me sugar pie. Okay. How. About. I. Just. Call. You.

Commander. Of. The. USSS. Alpha.Mu.Lightship.

Wanna take another ride?




lol… what fun and then the music ends, Vega. Then the show is over and life is back to… whatever it was. Fun… thanks for some fun, I appreciate it. It gets a little lonely down here sometimes this Earth. I…    I don’t do that much down here any more, Alpha Lyra. I just…   write? Not sure I can even call it that. I look out on the beach a lot. Watch the surfers hold ten… I mean hang ten! Sorry. I am not much of a surfer.

If you ever need a gf, look me up sometime. I live here alone, and keep a pretty well stocked bar. We can… I don’t know… Watch the NetPax… and scan the skies for ships of other worlds… somehow I think they will be landing soon. Hey Vega it was a lot of fun, you have probably written off te Earth as totally insane after hearing from me. One more world to avoid right? yah….  probably for the best. Sorry….  sorry I admit I am a flake. I think it is obvious my world has a long… long… long way to go before any other extraterran race would dare come here. Thanks to my transmissions… I think the Earth is pretty safe from any contact from aliens any time or at least for several billion years.

Don’t worry Vega. I am not going to stalk you or nothin’. I am really a nice person once you stop knowing me.



perfect result. 

Σ, repeating Θ, labeled ‘star’, motion, active. The stars above are always in motion when you think about it. What is that brighter star to the east, I would estimate, seventy degrees altitude, ninety azimuth. Must be Vega. In Lyra. Vega, are you out there? Do we have a way to communicate across distances that separate us? I have a feeling we do. I can hear you in these symbols, I see a star in the night sky. A star could be talking to me that way. A living being. Just happens to be a point of light, not a cat, dog, person. Humans… we unconsciously keep trying to cast our communication partners as creatures something like us. Probably has two legs and two arms like us, at the very least. Anything can be a living creature though, and may have other ways to talk. I wonder that stars, astronomical objects can talk to us this way.

Ε, view. You are right, it is still a view, viewpoint. A way to see it. Which appears to be what all of experience is, simply a personal view I have. So it is one more “view” within the larger “view” which I keep trying to understand. I don’t think there is that much understanding to be had. You can explore viewpoints. From various ways, sources. But that is about it. You begin to ensconce some personal, biased, choice of “view” and declare that to be “the facts” or something incontrovertible. Then you are wanting to turn our planet into a prison. Watch 1984, that is a pretty good picture of where that approach leads. And then below it is Β, play. That is where it will always try to get back to, fun, happy experiences, pleasure, playing, very innocent and free. Γ wants to make it all serious, then the Brain Farms begin to be built, and then you get to explore all these wonderful fruits of the Brain Farms, like… technologies, electricity, radios, spaceships, guns, nuclear bombs, wedding rings, cars, skyscrapers, poisons. All the wonderful crop of the little minds when they join hands and wish with all of their heart. I will admit it is quite remarkable, but what are we exploring? Little more than our own imaginations as a group. Well… we began to trust all that. The security of these brain fruits became everything to us. And I watched it all… come… apart. In Twenty Eighteen. Bad things began to happen… more often… and scarier each time… I remember we trief to make the bad guns go away… we thought a race of alien guns had entered our Earth, and we had to make them leave. Only… we had boxed ourselves into a corner… our constitution was there to protect our right to bear arms. What now? Accept the alien guns as our friends? Or rise up against them? We would only be rising up against ourselves. It would tear us apart to try and force something to change…  due process was the key there. Talk about it calmly. Keep living your lives, activism is NOT in the best interest of America. Schools… STAY IN SCHOOLS what are you people doing,” I remember the President really got on to them. “You have to keep living decent, calm American lives! GET YOUR TAILS BACK IN SCHOOL!” he screamed over the TotV sets. And we did. So what made it all come apart?

When alien ships began to land. That made it come apart. Then we all knew… in a split instant… that everything we knew was make-believe. Suddenly… it was here. The giant ships from beyond, blocking out the sun all over the planet. The entire planet was thrown into shadow. And people… began… to… freak. New Delhi wasn’t affected by it as much. The Indian peoples were used to strange phenomena sometimes. The Swami’s had predicted much of it anyway. No one in India was trying to imagine fanciful things. They built fanciful  crafts of their heart and those were their imaginations. SO when the ships came, they took in stride.

Not so with the USA. We freaked out. Began stocking up on supplies, food, people began trying to get bomb shelters built overnight, you couldn’t find a shovel anywhere. The nation went on top alert, the feel of impending war was in the air… but what war?

It was all in our own heads. There were no “enemies” out there. We had made it all up! We had imagined bad people of other nations because we had a guilty conscience as a people. And that is textbook freshman psychology, “when burdened with guilt and shame for some reason, the first response of the creature is to take the easy way out, and seek out some foreign source that now threatens. In that way, the conscience is overstepped for the sake of survival.” (AMA Psych source, see Griffen and James, Univ of Chicago, 2010.) So “survival” as a theme rises up for the guilt-ridden person (or country). It is a cowardly thing to do, but it is typical of juvenile forms of life. Survival was one way to push the shame and guilt away for another generation to deal with. It was a cop out.

And the United States of America had become real pros at it. Who has time to deal with matters of guilt! We have to protect ourselves! They are attacking us they are after us! Build more weapons build more armies… we are all completely insane as a nation and didn’t know it, couldn’t see it. It took brace people like Susan Hamilton to rub our faces in what was obvious. That we were all cowards and babies, deceiving ourselves and refusing to even consider the possibility that we had ever done anything wrong. How can majesty make a wrong move? How can a Queen do anything “wrong”, she is the Queen! If the queen does wrong things, then so do we all… and no one… was looking for new sources of guilt. We already had enough personally, everyone does stupid things, I sure know how to. Then the guilt and dread of it… “oh…  my… God… what I have done….” then all that dark feeling of shame… you look for relief, we are a great nation, we are a great people, we are great… great…    great…

Really? Then why are we so cowardly and refuse to face our mistakes? Greatness begins with apologies to others. I am sorry. We were wrong. I was wrong, please forgive me, please forgive my nation. Then you have hope to be great for the first time, one day.

I watched it all from a New Delhi hotel room, stationed there for the last year of training for Mars. I sat in Denoori Hilton and drank coconut milk coffee and ate leftover curry dahl and… cried… as I watched my home fall to ruins. My country tis of thee… sweet land… of liberty… had become…

the sweet land of mental illness, rampant, societal, insane. On the surface we looked okay. Hey I am making a paycheck, leave me alone. Yah on the surface it all looked hunky. But you look a little deeper, at the maggots that were chewing away on us, on our hopes and dreams… we were rot within, because there was guilt and shame in the air. And all the pretending and perfect teeth and perfect suits and perfect Campak angles in the world, couldn’t help humpty again.

There is dark cloud forming in the west… very dark… and very dire… and no one… no one… can talk about it. Well… one day. You will talk about it. You will have no choice but to talk about it. Because then… the need to survive…

will be real.

And not something we all dreamed up to salve our collective guilty conscience.

What about all that, Vega? Am I just a nut, ranting craziness and a prohetess of doom in Laguna? Is it just my own mental illness, and one day I will be better? What do you say to that…

ΘΓ. Motion share.

Hmm. You agree with every word of it. Well, maybe someone has to do it. Sound the alarm. Maybe that falls on me in this hour. Fine, I am up for it. Not much else going on, my beach life is nice, but not changing a lot.

2018-03-16 12:35:40

Well, you guys seem to have your act all together, so I will leave you alone. Try to. Since this is coming to you from the future, I have no real immediate impact from it. What happened, happened. Did it hurt? Yes it hurt, dear God it hurt many lost billions on billions of buck in the aftermath. But we made it through and came out the better for it. At least now we have a clear conscience as a nation! You can’t put a price on that.

I am one to talk, though. My conscience is always reminding me of my guilt and shameful behavior. The things I do in private… no one can see then… that I am ashamed of and it makes me feel “dirty”. I have whole boatloads of it… and I keep wondering why i don’t try to come clean, admit it. But I did admit it. I admit that my personal reality was so wrecked that there is no fucking way in hell I can make any clear choices any time soon to do, go, achieve, build any time soon. My mind… I don’t trust it any more. I don’t trust anything any more… I fall back on communication with other star systems.

Γ, share.

Yeah that keeps going takes the ΘΓ forward… there is something going on. The trouble could be real I could be in the center of a whirlwind brewing… I don’t know…  wth is going on…

ΑΒ, begin play.

Okay well that cleared it all out instantly. Now we are in Beta play theme, thank goodness. This is nOT going to be taking anything seriously at all. Play is looking for something fun to do now, it is not thinking about tomorrow. Or guilt. Play, Beta has no concept of guilt or shame. Only wanna have fun! No concept of bad, evil, wrong, right it is a kid at heart and here to have fun. That is the proper foundation!!! NOT SHAME AND GUILT. Shame and guilt there will always be plenty of to go around… play is what I should be focused on… to begin… something ….fun….   a movee! A painting? A poem! A book? A model… a kit… ham radio… I dunno… sex… you like sex? That is interesting to you THAT IS FUN! Should be common and easily played with, just be careful. But wth writing about it ain’t doing it. What am I to begin that is playful and fun? Not sure… move? Buy a protein bar?

Ν, repeating Γ, labeled “within.”

I just see a N and think “no”. Then what? Please tell me Vega! What fun is it I am beginning?

ΒΔ. play result, play nurture, play as some result in life that I would call “real”. Physical? Tangible I guess… physically play in some form.

Η, *, ______ .

That is this unknown theme, labeled, “unknown” without a label. It does not want a label it wants to just be Η, apparently. Eta. Is about it. To me it could be just about anything… divine themes, lovers is what it is in Tarot. In Runes, maybe… Uruz, the Aurochs. Zayn, a sword. So, as with Pertp and Algiz, Η could be stated as “meaning unclear; perhaps “The Lovers, a wild ox, sword.” Sounds like some guilty Lovers have to slay a bull as a sacrifice for their guilt, (Sin).

ΒΔΗ. Bah?    play nurture *? Play as a real result (of) *unknown*.

ΑΓ, begin share. ΒΔΗΑΓ. Begin to communicate or transact.

ΘΔ, motion nurture. ΒΔΗΑΓΘΔ. No idea. Motion as a result should be pretty obvious. Lost here.

ΒΓ, play share. This would be playful expressions over a more important or serious basis. Comedy being transmitted over technologies that support communications for the group, as an example. The Netv network, sends out all kinds of wild and fun comedies, romance, sci fi, fun! That is βγ. ΒΓ.

It gets real when it is in motion, on a surface. Moving pictures… then it is a “thing, object” but it is really not an object it is an experience you are buying. Not really a tangible equity. I can’t easily trade experiences like that with others. A real tangible physical object can be traded… not an experience. Unless I have some way to recreate the experience for you. Not sure what you are getting at. Play communications… play transactions… would be fun.  But they would be riding on some sort of solid transacting basis… that could handle more serious themes also. ΒΓ and ΓΓ are both working over the same carrier wave (Γ). So, if it were paint for example, a painting could be something fun or sexy, or it could be something horrible and scary. But it is all still only an “experience” that is being conveyed over Γ gamma  basis, paint in that case. If it is bad news, there is no way to “get to the seriousness” of it unless you somehow put yourself into that scene. It really doesn’t exist as a “real thing” it is all illusion. I can’t “get inside” a movee, I can’t get inside my own painting. It remains isolated from me. I can conjure up experiences, but those are not real. The only thing that is “real” is what is immediately around me. What I can directly perceive. All else is a myth as far as I am concerned. There are memories of things, people, past events, my childhood. But that is all questionable to me now I no longer trust any of it implicitly. Too many weird events associated with memories has led me to conclude most if not all memories are suspect. Not to say it didn’t happen. The question is… where the hell did they come from? And why am I now letting memories try to dictate my choices, choices which from past experience (again, memories but in this case, memories of personal pain), have seemed to always lead to problems, misunderstandings, pain, loss, endings and bad feelings and others now hate me. Great. No thank you to acting very much on memories any more. UNLESS the memories became an immediate physical condition that begins to force me into something, then I may act or make a choice. Otherwise… leave… me… the… hell… alone.

And I seem to be getting that wish granted every day lately. It is still only me. Alone in this house. Yes, I can hear the waves in the distance washing up on these California shores… but so what! That isn’t a friend in my home. I am alone and miserable a lot. I am getting my wish granted. Leave me alone. “With pleasure!” the rest of existence seems to say in response.

ΗΒ, *,  _____ play. Unknown, unclear something, related to play basis. Okay so maybe none of that has been clear to you, Vega. Umm… I do not know… maybe you need me to use the same language set. I can try…

Lets try to ask Vega star system a question. “What would you like to talk about.” This is a question so I would preface or end it with Η.

H (?, what would) ΞΔ (you) Β (like, pleasure) Γ (talk about).


You: Κ

Kappa, away, out of the pattern. You want to talk about something in transition between phases, or it is not fitting in, or it is alone, Tarot, The Hermit. Okay. Do you want to talk about that theme, or do you want me to relate K to some sort of experience of reality I am having currently? (So how to say that in symspeak… )

Do Η you ΞΔ want (desire, aim)Α to talk Γ about that theme (Κ), ΞΔΚ, or (measure, repeating play) Μ do you want ΗΞΔ me (my, secure viewpoint) ΔΕ to relate Ζ (Kappa theme) K to some sort of experience of reality I am having currently (my reality) ΔΕ ΔΔ.


You: Ν

Hmm… you sent back Ν, repeating Γ, label “within”. To me that is supportive of the discussion of that THEME (K), not taking that theme and trying to relate it to reality as a result around me. That is an angry pool of mixed blessings that I am not so sure about anymore. This is not a recipe to get life working out, this seems to be its own end (result, purpose). You seem to want to look at K as a theme. Talk about that without it being tied to my life around me (physical life). Okay no more questions in Greek too much work. K theme, hmm…

ΗΓ, *Γ, _____ share.    I think you are trying to get me to share my view on K theme? There is something unclear about Γ. Or “unclear, talk about that. ”

Κ to me has no place in this pattern…


There are only nine possible places there. A 10 has no way to be placed. We could get rid of the tens… should I do that? Then I am monkeying around with tradition… some folks loved 10, K… so.. what now? K seems to be just left hanging (N, within; t. ‘hanged man’)… there is no 10th chair, only 9. So… K just seems to float around in limbo I guess. Until matter get going again in Α. Then it is resolved. Then the preoccupation is with the new pattern, and taking A to I. Until that begins though, there is no place for Κ, so it lives in a sort of untethered existence, that does not really seem to have any relevance or bearing on anything. No real social interaction to speak of, even home and family relationships are distant and vague and sketchy and seem to be adrift in fog most of the time. Then choices are difficult when creatures from the 1-9 past try to reach out to me, based in some collection of memories I have, and compel me to “do something”. I balk at it, no matter what it is. I can’t act! I am a Kappa I AM NOT REALLY EVEN ALIVE by all practical definitions. K is not a member of the little theater act going on, K is lost or hopeless and is okay with being hopeless and lost and IS NOT GOING TO BE AS SOURCE OF REVENUE FOR THE SOCIETY BY “FIXING” K.  K does not need fixing! K IS YOU!!! K IS YOUR OWN LAWLESS AND IMMORAL CHOICES BEATING AGAINST YOUR HOUSE and the big bad wolf is about to blow the whole thing down.

There. That was some ΑΓ about Κ.


Begin nurture, begin real, intent (is) result. You seem to be telling me that that right there begins a tangible “real” something that should have a place in the reality of life, that is is tiny as a beginning, but it is real and it should grow into something that is needed or has a place. Maybe I just don’t appreciate what I do. Maybe I can’t see the value because I am too close to it… not sure… but there should be equity here. It should have some financial value, one would think. If it were a career, but I don’t know what ‘career’ this is. It sure ain’t on any curriculum lists, The Study of Tarot for Fun and Profit 101. wth… begin nurture… that is where I get lost. How would that be done? But it doesn’t look like something “I do” it is something that nature does.

ΘΑ, motion begin. Now some path gets in motion.

Ξ, repeating nurture, labeled “part”. Δ2. Nurture again.

ΝΒ, repeating Γ, labeled “within” of play. Results repeating, communications repeating of playful (something).

ΓΒ, share play. Same thing as ΝΒ, only one of them, not two of them.

ΗΒ, *Β, _____ play. Hmm…. if that was a sequence, we are looking at


So in that case, the ? is beginning the count. It some sort of “pre” count or null ?  in play theme… empty play or void, nothingness, (of) B, play. It will be interesting to see where they take this next…

Θ, motion.

Motion theme then. Weird. How come motion, active all of sudden? That was a sequence (sort of) and then, α Lyrae sends Θ.

Zero? I wonder they are suggesting 0 as the start there… so…


Let’s see what you think about that…

ΓΒ, share play. Maybe this is fun for you, maybe α Lyra loves to talk this way… I have wondered… that across all the universe are those who love to talk simple talk like this… just a few little words is all we need… feelings… don’t… need… a… million… words… to… say…

i heart u

ΝΓ, repeating Γ, labeled “within”, share again in share. This is Γ3.

ΛΑ, repeating begin, of intent. Labeled “turn” (of) intent.

ΝΓΛΑ. President Trungston was right. The guns ain’t the issue.



Oh, I give up sir… I have tried to beat some sense into them… you do a wonderful job sir… each… and… every president I have tried to understand. And each one was precisely who we needed at that time. I don’t know what to tell you, sir. Go to Mars maybe.

He will probably read this in the past then, five years ago… you could read that… I hope you do, and you should know that you led us through a dark hour, sir… you did great… even today… in 2023… you are still our commander in chief… and thank goodness we have a land again… clean and healthy in all the rivers and everywhere… the borders were locked down of course. The WALL of LOVE they called it… is something to see. Stretching from Albuquerque to Baton Rouge… we learned that sometimes, you have to draw a line in the sand before you can play beach volleyball.

omg what am I on today… this is nuts… who am I talking to Vega… I must be insane… who… the… am I talking to…

ΙΔ, complete nurture, perfect result.



Β, play.

Θ, motion. Something playful or fun that is active.

ΖΒ, relate play.

Okay, try another one.

ΜΒ, ΛΔ. A repeating playful fun something or other, that is also beginning again as a real thing.

ΔΔ, nurture2.

Okay, again…

ΜΑ, ΜΔ. A repeating playful beginning (intent) that is a playful result of some sort.

ΖΔ, relate nurture.


ΖΔ, Μ, ΑΒ. A relating result, the product of a repeating playful (x), that began to play.

ΛΒ, repeating begin (of) play. Again, I think you want me to keep doing this. Three again…

ΔΒ, ΓΔ, ΗΔ. The results are all in, there was something playful, it was in communication, and there was something unusual about it.

Π. Repeating relate, labeled “see”. (Also can be labeled “the Devil, eye, or possibly Sun.”)

Okay, I see I messed up there. Thought it was ΒΔ. It was ΔΒ. So, let’s try it again… The resulting playful communication of life, that is also mysterious and real.

ΒΔ, play result. I would take it to be affirming as a result. Maybe Π is saying wrong, or mistake. Bad. Or sneaky. Or a girl chaser.

ΖΓ, Η, ΜΑ. A relating communication of some unknown nature, what we do know it that it is repeating a playful beginning (of some form).

ΑΑ. begin begin.

ΒΑ, ΑΔ, ΓΔ. A playing around with a beginning (of some sort), it begins because it is what nature desires, and it communicates, because this is also what nature (or life) desires.

ΕΓ. view share. My view on that? I would say the playing around could be anything goes, and that nature would guide as long as there is any playing around at ALL.

Ι, complete.

Γ, ΞΔ, ΝΔ. Share, a repeating nurture of nurture, a repeating communication of nurture. Sharing how repeating nurturing results can be repeatedly talking as a result.

ΑΔ, begin nurture. Begin (as a result). Something would happen that begins (some “x”) but it is not something I try to begin. The intent would arise out as some product of existence, apart from me (ALONE) in some active role.

ΛΒ, a repeating beginning of something fun. Three again…

Β, ΚΑ, ΗΒ. Play, away begin, ____ play. Playing around with some sort of “out of the normal” intention, to/of some unknown playful pattern. “You are just playing around. This is so unusual a direction, and it is just plain weird as a play activity.”

ΖΔ, relate nurture. Relate as a result. Relating is the result in this case. So the dialog seems to be a way to empathize into the scene. Relating with the characters or whatever is saying this.

ΝΔ, ΜΒ, Ε. A repeating share result of a repeating play play, with a view.

Π, repeating Ζ, labeled “see”. The Sea view.

ΓΑ, ΓΒ, Λ. Share begin, share play, turn (or, repeat begin).

Turn  = share play, share begin.
Repeat begin = share begin begin, share play.

ΕΓ, view share. View shared.

What (?, H/P) is (=, balance =  measure, M) your (owned thing that is label, ownership = equity = Δ, me = E) identity (qualities, nature, characteristics, the many Δ, ΘΔ.)


ΗΔ, _____Δ. Okay you can’t or unable to answer that, understood. No reply possible = (not, K), reply (Γ), possible (a chance out of a set, one part of the set = Α,Ξ.


ΕΔ, view nurture. view is the result. Okay I see what you mean, that a “view” is always going to be the result of your identity or nature. You become whatever I view you as, so it is not definable. If all possibilities are possible as an answer, then there is no way to define it, the identity simply becomes everything, X. (Chi, everything, the world, signature). I don’t know why I am always after that answer. It is obviously not going to help, nature is in charge of these forms, it is not a choice, should be the general condition.

ΑΑ, begin begin. Double anything sounds affirming to me.

ΝΑ, repeating share, communication, dialog, something more serious… related to…


Right? I think you know what I am talking about… how I want to love you as best as I can… forever… is that possible? Is… that… even possible? I want to believe that it is… I want. With all. My. Heart. To be that to you, for you, with you… honor and respect and… always… always listening, to you… between the lines… to understand you. So that I can be… everything I can be… for you. To… understand your heart… who you are… just the way that nature made you.       Lovely as any spring shower on any world. Sweet as sassafras bugs in a cold barn at midnight. Warm as the sun… you.

Well… I will leave it all up to…   to what? To life, I guess. Whatever it means, won’t stop me from loving you right where I am… as far as I am concerned. We are as good as hitched already.

These are the silent ways of astronauts in space. Who sing… AND SHARE… with all of their might. To be…    AN AMERICAN ASTRONAUTA TO BE THERE FOR MY COUNTRY, out here… where there is no up or down… out there… where there is no guarantees… that anything will ever turn out right. To be…  a patriot.  Of stellar ways…   to defend the Constitution of the UrSAe majoris… to be a girl a guy can depend on… to be a boy that a girl would like to know. To be real and tender… hearted… is… just ABOUT…   the o nly   goal I have any more… until my next spacecast. To you, dear Earth of my origins…   all… my…  love… and all the affection that this ship can send back home…. about halfway to Mars now… and already I feel like we have…      lived there.     Many years, already.     Many… years…

to make a TOWN of our hearts… to build a new city on A NEW WORLD. TO HAVE THAT CHANCE TO GET IT RIGHT..  right from the beginning. That is why we are out here…. that is why…

we…    go          to Mars.      That is why      we go.

(And then Cmdr. Michelle kissed her finger tips and placed them on the lend of the vidTrans set…  kisses from a little space ship.)

Ν, repeating share, label, “within”. That is simply a repeat of comms. It is not a new thing… it is the same thing repeating… over… and… over…

ΜΑ, repeating play, relating to begin. Playing and playing about A BEGINning. A person will do anything to stay alive. Same goes for our minds. Instincts kick in… tell you… that no matter what is dragging me down. Sending me over and over into darkest gloom… that someone is still out there for me… and as long as I reached out for you, I was so happy and at peace… when I run away. Try to be… normal again… then I am so sad. Enough to hate this place… no wonder they let us write… anything. .. anything we needed to… NASA knew our minds were the key to everything. Metals and circuits and vacuum pressure gauges and rocket engines… all that we can handle… but our minds…. if we lost those. Who… will tend to the ship… what will be left of the crew…

Γ, Τ, Ζ. Sounds like a nice place to have it… perfect. I will let you work out all the details… and your dress? Don’t let me see it! Not until… you know. I know… we haven’t even met yet and I am already taking you down the aisle… how silly of me I know. I can’t help it! Share, a repeating complete, labeled the moon, relate. Share, the moon… relate.  Communicate… with… the Moon… okay… I will try. I know there is no reason to talk to you, send you transmissions. The real chances of you actually hearing me are slim to none… but I will still try. I think of you to this day. And dream of seeing you again. I will probably be killed because of what I am saying. I don’t care. Let the worst happen I want to leave this place anyway. I wish we could have hung out more, shot the breezes… just talked and I was curious about you. How it was you seemed to know so much about me… it was uncanny… like… my life was an open book to you. So if I am dead tomorrow, that is why.

It is because I tried to communicate with the Moon. And now. All hell will break loose. I am convinced we are embroiled in a battle for the possession of this planet. And I was stupid enough to get caught in the middle of the damn thing. Dumb, dumb dumb! But… whatever… it is what it is. I side with the Moon. Any chance with you I am gone from the Earth, dead or just go insane. Whatever it takes.

ΖΓ, ΓΓ, Ο. Relate share, share share, merge (repeating view, labeled ‘merge’). Relate Share3 Merge. Relate Shareγ Merge. So… there is a subtext of something more serious here… you see that, ΚΞΓ? You see how that little communications marker appeared… yes… something… more… serious… I think.

Ρ, repeating Η, **,  ______ ?

I wouldn’t even know where to begin. Whatever I say there would be a guess. Of course they are all guesses… all a lot of assumptions at best… like, little toys for the mind. Lots of little toys. Maybe one of them will work, and keep me sane. Maybe. Maybe I gave up the fight so long ago I can’t even remember when it occurred. Mystery…    I guess a person is always safe to say, “it is all a mystery to me… unknown at best… whatever I am doing, whatever we are doing… it is all make believe… assuming this is true… what can we build. And…       oh! Look at that! Look at what we can do now. Look at what we can build now…

Oh! Look at that! Look a what we can no longer do now. Look at what we can no longer build now…

We are a rather… confident people I would say. Very, confident. Let’s hope you impress something… bigger than me… with all that confidence we have.

Α, begin. Well, it is the first one in the set. Would it be too much to stretch one’s faith out there and say it seems to be relate to the start of something. Is that forbidden? Why don’t we start with what is allowed… and go from there…

what d’ya say. Or is that list shrinkin’ every day?    Pretty soon…    be real short…       one word…



heaven help us all heaven help us to be an open world heaven help me to be as open.

heaven help us all

forests help us all forests help us to be a patient world forests help me to be as patient.

forests help us all

oceania. help us take care of you. help us oceania help us take care of you. moon. help us take care of you. help us… help us think… help us talk about it… help me think… hey I am just babbling… getting wasted waiting for the sun to go down… so I guess this is it. Where it all leads. See, I kept thinkin’… if I just kept going… just… keep…  going… that eventually my neighbor would finally get outta bed….    see…   who in the hell was bangin’ on the door downstairs…    and then…      to see I was banging on make believe… I was banging on… dumb luck…   so much for plan alpha. what is plan beta?

I am guessin’ that there is a growing percentage… every day roun’ these parts… askin’ the same thing.     Does… anyone…   know…   what…  plan… b…    is…. .. .. . .  .   .     .       ?

And then… the room always gets real…  real…   quiet. About that time.    You could hear a pin drop from a million miles away. Yeah. Does… anyone…  know if anyone thought about a…  you know…    a backup plan. No?    Or yes. Is it a big secret? Oh I get it. It is our confidence… our…

great faith in God.

That means we don’t need a plan bravo. Certainly…   He…     will always…    always…    watch over us. Plan B? Who needs a plan B. Plan A is guaranteed to work, guaranteed. As long as we…  can…  keep on obeying. Being sweet as pumpkin pie.

Space ships always have a backup plan. This doesn’t work, try this. That doesn’t work, try this. That doesn’t work do this… this… this… until finally. If… all… else… fails…

Make your peace with your higher power.

Omg that sounds so depressing. It is so… ultimate like all these laws of logic that constantly trap the fiction writer. I need to take a break. Excuse me for a few minutes I need to go for a walk on my wonderful beach here… the wonderful warm sunshine beaches of California in the warm months.

I am lost as usual, ΚΞΓ. So lost and not sure, I know I must like doing this or I wouldn’t be doing it. But I think this is it. I think it is just me and you sharing back and forth in some private space is all I can figure. Almost like… we have been isolated from everyone else… everything else… quarantined in a way from others. It feels alone… it has felt that way for years…  maybe it is because…

we were.    alone.        So what is nature’s point in that. And why are we that way, what is going on that you and I are isolated like this from everyone else. Why is life so determined to keep me away from everything?

Well, it is a result. Whatever you want to say about that, could be wrong. An explanation is going to be a viewpoint, and there are countless views. What can be said, is that for whatever reason it is a result within existence as I am experiencing it. And while I may not understand it. Or may have issues with it… what I can see clearly and logically is that it is simply a result at this moment in time of life. And life… can not be a guilty party to herself. You can’t make all of existence guilty of something. You just can’t do it. It would simply swap poles or something and turn right back into something fun and interesting and exciting. Not dumb, and violent and abusive. Existence appears to have some built-in sanity checks that prevent it from turning into utter chaos again. Maybe it was chaos at one point, but that isn’t the goal any more. We are trying to be a planet. We are trying to be somebody we know. And can respect. That is what we are seeking whether we admit it or not… we all want respect and we want to know that we truly earned it. Not bought. Not a trick. Something real.

Well, I did a little experiment there with our guest, off line. And I can say with rather firm conviction that “off line” and “online” are the same, they are at unity, appears to be the case. Now some of you will understand what that means and some of you won’t. Those who do, know what that means.

ΞΔ, repeating nurture (of) nurture, or “part nurture”, would be one way to label it. It is the most grounded or “most result” of the set. ΔΔΔ is what is stated there, it is Earth, Earth, Earth, as “existence, this, moment” in some experiential way. To the greatest possible extent as a “result” called Earth.

ΙΑ, complete begin. I was seeing this a lot off line too… the completion that is very basic, basic, basic, contrasted with the completion that is filled out and unable to expand beyond its present point. The Iota’s are evidence of that. They are perfect in all their ways… the perfectly working technologies… and they also are unable to expand or develop from this point, in this model. This is a model space so the rules could be possibly different for “real life”, however my experience has been that the models track 1:1 with reality as a result. The real choo choo train looks pretty dad gum close to the toy one.